Tuesday 20 November 2012

I'm Scared...

Hi Guys, it's been a sort of longish time - but not if you're me or a time-traveller...

Today's blog is inspired by this video:



So, if you watched that you must be thinking, what?

Why am I scared? Why am I worried about life? I've just been to Venice, and had an awesome holiday, I have an amazing job - my last two shifts involved flying helicopters for 18-hours, and I have a manuscript still landing on the desks of Agencies and Publishing Houses all over the country. So, what am I scared of?

To be frightfully honest, I'm scared of letting people down. Well, that's the main one. At the moment, my priorities are my job. This is my first full-time job, and I hope that I'm actually good at it (I'm happy there at the moment, I know that much). My colleagues are superb, uplifting, and really funny. 

Though at the same time I realise that The Writing People (wearethewritingpeople.co.uk) seems to be lagging behind because of it. Now I feel like that's due to my inability to do anything about it when I'm on the job, my second let-down, which is tied into the first is the Prince's Trust money. I don't think I'm going to have time to think about what to spend it on, or even research it. 

I just don't know where my head's at with the whole project.

Thirdly, some of you might know that I've been doing a Creative Writing Course for the Bridgend Youth Service. I've definitely not gotten as far with it as I would have liked, and yet again I feel like I'm letting them down.

I feel like I've been lagging behind in general - I started writing this on Sunday, and it's now Tuesday (FYI). I don't know - it's weird.

But I know, I'm loving this job - don't you doubt it either.

I also hate to say it, but I'm still confused about what is happening between HB and I - perhaps confused is the wrong word. I don't know. That's a whole other blog...again...

Carpe diem, until next time bloggers...!

Thursday 1 November 2012

Square One...

It's been a busy week...

Let me explain.

And I'll start with yesterday, for reasons I don't really know. I arrived, hopefully, for the last time at the Job Centre. I've been going there almost every Wednesday for the last nine-months. Yesterday, I signed on, to get next week's money, only to sign off.

What a momentous occasion. I'm now off benefits and Monday I go to my Hamleys training. A new era of my life starts, and its going to be a big change.

Tuesday, a review I wrote came second in it's category and that was cool and stuff.

Monday, I went shopping with HB...

I know, I have no idea where I stand. Ignores me for three-months, and then arranges shopping trips and late-lunches. Hmm...

It was a really fun day, and we spent a bit of money, but now I think I'm more than confused. And then, yesterday she just dropped by mine to borrow some DVDs and hand-back a Cake Dish of mine. It was odd, and I'm convinced I was rude on both occasions now that I think about it...but not intentionally if that's what you were thinking.

I really don't know. My mind is being lazy today...in a week's time the gang and I shall be in Venezia, and everything will be fine...

Carpe diem, until next time bloggers...