Nothing At All...

I remember being asleep, and expecting to wake up very early on into the night. I don't know why, perhaps I was just uncomfortable, but then this morning I woke up, into the darkness of an October morning thinking about Marriage and Minecraft...

Tis an odd one I hope you agree, unless of course you know the connection between the two, because I sure as hell don't. I think three couples I know have become engaged this year, with a potential two more on the way. Which, to put that into perspective, before this year, I had only been to two weddings (counting my eggs before they've hatched), and probably five funerals. So in just a few weeks they've given me the potential to go to just as many weddings as funerals, if not more (do wedding receptions count?)...

And any way, Minecraft, I was thinking of moulding a castle and battling some spiders or some shit like that. Good gracious, why aren't my blogs about anything at the moment? I wonder...

Perhaps I feel my writing ability has somewhat become dulled by this repetition and routine, although with routine comes perfection (well, not really). It's certainly not dull. By most people's standards I live quite a remarkable and extraordinary life. I go for breakfasts, lunches, and dinners, cinema trips, telly days, different apartments and houses, all with people I love (j'adore), adore, and admire. And after all, for writing's sake NaNoWriMo's around the corner (should I do it again?)...

There's going to be an opportunity for me to attend a party thrown by my Big End Friends soon, but I don't think I can go. It's funny how we can all swim in different circles but then come together as if nothing in the world has changed and everything is perfectly fine. That's why I like seeing Wodge, that and she's always got a story, a jiggle dance, or a panda to show us.

And then I was thinking of publishing a list of girls I had fancied throughout my life and trying to figure out the link between them all, apart from all being pretty, but then I realised the list was far too small for a man with my reputation, and a reputation this good took me 23 years to build after all. I can't have people thinking that beneath this callous, rapey, and oddly-attractive exterior lies a warm, pleasant, and pleasing to the eye individual. Wouldn't you agree? Quite right...

Perhaps next time I won't talk so much shit...

Carpe diem...

About Time And Other Things...

I don't think I could put into words the emotions and feelings I felt last night, in fact I don't even think I want to share them with you as they were so deep and personal, as I watched Richard Curtis' new film, About Time with my nearest and dearest...

I'm not even going to tell you very much about the film, I just want you to see it, and know that when the credits rolled, I didn't go 'is that it?' I turned to Tag and said, 'I would gladly sit and watch that again right now.' And I don't think I've ever said that about a movie, ever. There are films I could watch to death, but not over and over, so well done About Time. There's just so many perfect moments, wonderfully crafted, and each as beautiful as the next, so wonderfully crafted in fact that I just want Richard Curtis to write my life from now on. I wish I was a charming, bumbling, babbling, fool, with the greatest super power in the world (yes I said it). There's only one or two instances in my life so far that I would want to do over, and do properly, and they're only in the past year. Any before then seem utterly pointless now, and I suppose that's what the movie was essentially all about. 

I know I might see the world a little differently to a lot of you. I see most things with a sense of wonder and awe, which is probably why I like wandering around so much. But it's always words I seem to stumble on. I realised after the movie, that there were questions shooting around in my head, questions I would have normally asked, and been none-the-wiser for the answer. There were things that I could have said, and chose not too, and I think at one point I was actually charming for two-minutes. 

We made our own perfect moment last night, none complained about the cold, and we barely spoke. We just looked out over the marina (mar-in-er) with a sense of adventure, accomplishment, and thoughtful reservation, cocktails in hand, wondering what was out there, and gazing at the underwater beauty only the night time could bring.

I think that might be the most perfect moment, that snippet, that we've ever had. And we have had some perfect moments together. Lounging in the back garden with wine, music, and a midsummer's evening, wandering in the park during a heavy shower, and the countless hours we have comforted and enjoyed each other's company at our favourite haunt. And I wouldn't go back and change a thing, but I would go back and relive them all.

I was even surprised to see a familiar relationship on screen, that just so happens to be one I have with my father. And I wonder, when the time comes, whether I will think 'did he love me if he didn't show it?' The answer is of course, and always will be, 'yes'. 

And before I return to my day-to-day there was something else I wanted to share with you. Something that played before the film, and something so epic, so get-up-and-go, and so tremendously brilliant that I wanted to share it to encourage me to do even better, again. (And Red, I didn't mean to insult you - if I did, you made a face - when I said 'guys, shall we go to university again?' - you were obviously included in the question.)

All in all, I want to say that last night changed my life, and has made me a better person, and I certainly hope that's true. I'll try and shut up a lot more, think about what I'm about to say, and bumble and babble through life as charmingly and as foolishly as I possibly can...

Carpe diem...